Its 1.45 am now.. How come im not in bed? I can't sleep, maybe because i took a nap or maybe i just don't want to sleep... Been thinking what i did today... Later morning he suppose to come over to my house and spent time with me... But i'm not really sure i want him to come or not... If he come, he will get bored, definitely, because theres nothing to do with me... If he don't come, i am sure i will feel sad... I discussed with him on this matter, he commented : "What do you want? I don't know how to make you happy... I got no mood to chat already..." It end up like this... Haih... Why am i always doing things that will make him unhappy? How come i just can't tell him what i want? Actually, what do i want? And can he give me what i want? Can he answer all my doubts? Can he be patient and listen to me and understand how i feel? Can he stand at my side and stop saying that im wrong? Or, actually it all happen because of me? It really hurts when he say he don't know how to make me happy, and it hurt more when he say he got no mood to chat... I just don't know how to reply to him anymore... What should i do so that he understand and i won't hurt him, and myself? Want to cry again... Is the shoulder going to be here in the morning? Is he still want to come over now? I really want to hug him... A very tight tight hug... Sorry... When will i learn? When will i think about the consequences 1st before i do things? And why am i always end up saying sorry? Why can't i learn from my mistakes? Why am i so childish? Why am i always giving him a hard time? Why......???